Keys to Happiness #2

The Bible tells us to love our neighbor as ourselves. It has two parts, love others and love self. It is a balance. The first half of this is to love our neighbor. We know that giving and helping others is fulfilling and we are told to do it.

But what about the other side? Do we really love ourselves? Sometimes not. Sometimes we put the needs of everyone else before ours and we never get around to taking care of ourselves or being nice to ourselves. In the case of parents, caretakers, the sandwich generation, people in jobs that serve the public (such as teachers, social workers, ministers, chaplains and other similar serving jobs) and giving people, this sacrifice of self is becoming epidemic. After a point we can become miserable, physically ill and weary of life. A lot of the people who feel bad and go to the doctor for treatment or even wind up in the hospital are suffering from this malady. It shortens people's lives according to authors I have read. This is not what Jesus had in mind for us when He said, I came that you might have life and have it abundantly.

There are many steps one can take to renew themselves so they have something left to give. One is to set boundaries. Think the people you are sacrificing for can't get along unless you are constantly at their beck and call? What are they going to do if you have a heart attack, stroke or collapse? I know of instances where the caretaker died before the ones they were caring for. You are not invincible and it can happen. Just look at the obituaries. You are doing them a favor by taking time for yourself and setting limits on your life. That way you get to stay around longer.

So how can a person get some joy back in their life when they feel life has milked them dry? Here is one suggestion that anybody can do. Make sure you treat yourself to something special every day. It doesn't have to be big. Listen to a song you enjoy, go for a walk, if you like strawberries or grapes or any other food, treat yourself to them, read a chapter out of a book you enjoy, spend some time on a hobby, go to the art museum, you get the picture. You need to do something nice for yourself every day.